About the Poem
I lost my very dear friend. She was (and still is) very special, because she is the one who taught me what it's like to be myself, she helped me discover myself.
She told me that there is no sin in being yourself and loving yourself. She also told me of God and the Love He has for me. She opened myself to myself - she was always there, helping and caring when I was going through this difficult process. And now - we don't even see each other any more and if we see each other in the street - we great like strangers!
I did not lose her by my own 'mistake', but by the wickedness of someone else - my mother who is very possessive of me. It is always bad to loose something that is so precious, especially when they are still there.
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Just by the thought of you
I find myself all sad again.
I've lost you, but also gained.
I know I must be grateful,
but my soul is sad for you.
I'll remember you always
for the good you have done,
for the seed you have sown,
for the faith you have given me
and for the example you set.
Yet, I find myself all sad again,
in my thoughts,
in my joys.
My thoughts are closed,
cause you don't look there anymore.
The season is over and
I know I must be happy
but the loss is too big
and the pain too intense.
I need to tell you my new story,
see your eyes,
experience your smile
and taste the tea we usually drink.
I just so much wish
you could see the harvest of my life
from the seeds you have sown!
Especially now, when it's full in harvest -
I know your soul would have smiled.
But then again, although I'm sad -
I know I'm glad -
cause I know I've saved you.
I'll rest my heart in that . . .