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About the Poem

I wrote this one night while I was trying to lie to myself. I tried to say that this person had meant nothing to me - a vain attempt to get over my broken heart.

We were actually perfect for each other, but I wanted nothing more than to mend my own heart in the quickest way possible. He was the first person I have ever loved and it hurt when I still loved him, but he no longer had the same feelings for me.

Deceiving Me

When I said I loved you,
It was a lie.
Lust is what
I felt inside.
I'm still wondering
what love is,
This couldn't have been it,
it wasn't all bliss.
We definitely wouldn't
be good together;
The two of us mixing
was like bad weather.
You were snow,
and I was the sun.
The task of staying together
could never be done.
If I say this over and over,
maybe I'll believe.
I'll get out of this okay,
if I can deceive me.
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© 1999 Erin Howley Please respect the rights of the author and Passions in Poetry. If you would like to use this poem on your own web page, please contact the Author. Thank you.

75 Visitor Comments

vanessa
I Sometime Fell Like This!
amanda
this poem was really great because it was like i was reading in this boys mind that i once loved and this is what he felt for me. it sucks that i loved him and he didnt love back but this poem told me in terms of who he is.
Brook
This was an absolute wonderful poem. i loved it.
bri
Excellent poem it is heart warming and verey trueishly eye catching
melissa
Your poem was so sad and touchig. I really felt it. Im sorry you ever felt that way. Im sorry you had to go through that. But I still really loved your poem.
Destiny
Thats exactly how I feel about my ex Justin. But i've finally come to realization that I will never be back with him but I will always love him.
natasha
wow i never new their could be a break up poem but i guess everyday theres a new surprise so awsome poem okkk!
Lauren
So far out of the ones I read on this site, this I relate to most.
Yesenia
I understand it. Some people just weren't meant to be. I was really touched by it.
Ashwin
A nice poem ,touched me deep. very close to my life, seems that it was written for me. Excellent work
brebre
that was sad and good
evonna
I absolutly love this poem it describes everything I feel right now it describes teenage love perfectly for me at least and I love it even more because i'm a poet myself and i've been trying to write a poem that describes how i've been feeling and then i found this one and it's exactly what i've been trying to write keep up the good work =]]
Jadeline
I thought that poem was so good and it reminds me of a boy i once was in love with but i noticed we werent meant for ecahother! i love that poem so much! xoxox ~JADA~xoxox
andria
i know exactly what you mean! and how you feel. kinda like you just want to forget about everything hoping the pain will go away!
Alexis
Bravo Bravo. I like this so very much. Wonderful job.
shellie
wow i like your poem alot for a guy it was good keep up the good work your poem was hot
Marcus
that was real good
Samantha
I felt the same way and still do and i lived thiz poem and i def. love this poems!
Brittany
This is a very good poem. I liked it simply because I feel esactilly that way myself.
john
your poem TOUCHED me. it touched me so deep, deeper than any poem. your poem is thebest thing that happened to me in my life. il ove you. marry me. NOW
Maya
I know how u felt. But I am glad I went trough it. I felt so bad. But now I know that I can go on only with someone that really loves me and not by somone that helps me lie to myself. Nice job with the poem, I really liked it
lalala
loved it
Katelin
THIS POEM WAS THE BEST I HAVE EVER READ!
Bubzarina
This is a really good poem, I think we all try to decieve our true feelings especially about love. I can realte to this poem like I wrote it myself. Thank you for this poem!
Jacqy
This poem is extremly sad but true. this is what most girls do. Sometimes I wish that we could just give up in a relationship as easily as they can. But I honestly don't think it can be done with out us trying our best to keep what we believed was true Love. Love the poem. keep up the good work!
Allisson
i like the poem i thought it was special and rite to the point
tank
its a really good poem and i know how u feel
tank
this one touches me b/c i think it will happen in a few days to me :(
bob
very nice
meghan
this is the best poem ever read.
shawna
I really liked this poem a. lot because it reminded me of a boy that I think that I'm in love with, but sometimes I try to tell myself I'm not because all he does is hurt me, and I think this poem really expresses the way I feel! I think it is a terriffic poem! Keep up the good work!
Amy
This a tight poem! Its exactly how I feel about boy named Johnny.
Amanda
Wow, this is a great poem. So many of us dont want to feel this pain, so we deny it and lie to every1 including ourselves. You brought the feeling to life with your poem, thanx. You should be proud of yourself and your work. Keep it up. God Bless.
2way
this poem was said in a way that i could relate with if i were to scale this from 1-10 i would scale it with a 8
caitlin
Very good. It was touching. It really makes ya think. I have tried to decieve myself many times but honestly i don't think it can be done the heart is stronger than the brain in my personal opinion. Very good writing
Angel
This poem touches the feeling of love I have for a person who doesn't seem to feel the same way back. So I think this poem is one of the best I ever read before.
Amy
Hey i thought this was a pretty good poem keep up the good work and i just also wanted to let you know that this poem helped me get threw a relationship which i was sun and he was snow and it could never be so we split and this was exactly how i felt and thanks for that help amy
red
I really loved this poem. Its how i felt and still fell. thank u for showing me the way
Nick
This poem reminds me of what I once said to a guy that I said I love you too. It really brought a smile to my face
larissa
i give this poem a nine out of ten because i can relate to what the pot was talking about and i feel like its a really emotional poem that alot of people go through.
sara
I am so glad I read that poem. I used to lie to myself all the time. I told a boy I didn't love that I loved him, and the worst part was I believed it. After reading this poem, I now know that it was a lie. A way to get myself out of a situation I'm going through. pregnancy. Teen pregnancy. But now I know that the father of my future baby I do not love. I will be fine. At least I know the truth. And that, I believe, is always the first step. Thank you.
Lauren
GREAT poem. bravo. i know i would be the same way.
renae
i can relate to it.
Jelvisc
i think that this was a great poem, i really loved your astrolgy that you used Ex. ( snow and sun ) sincerealy, jesse
Vanessa
This was a great poem. I can relate to nit because I am going through it right now. The guy I love is now ignoring me and I act like I don't care but I love him so much.
Keara
The reason why I liked this poem because I went throught the same thing with my ex. I tryed to act like he meant nothing when I really still loved him and needed him alot. So this poems reminded me of what I once had.
whitney
wow this poem makes feel like im with my ex again. I loved it keep up the good work your truly awesome at writing poems!
Kriz
This is a great poem Erin, i know exactly how you feel! it's the same with me and my x but now i'm better, you're a great girl and i hope your all better now. keep it up!
Desiree
Good Peom. I loved it.
Hayley
I just love your poem soooooo much. I can relate to it in so many different ways.
ashley
I like your poem i know where you are comeing from
J
This poem descibe of what I feel about my x. great poem!
Mark
Hey, excellent poem. This poem made me realize that love sometimes really isn't love. It's only lust, and this poem makes me wonder how my girlfriend really feels about me. Keep writing, and I'll be sure to show it to her to find out. If tings don't go the right way. hey I'll live right? Keep writing.
just
ok, this poem is alright. i wouldnt say that its the best that i've read BUT it really reminds me of someone. but, hey keep up the good work
Ashley
I`m feelin the same thing! This boy and me was talkin he told me that he loved me and that we should be together but the whole time he was just saying that than I found out he was talking to my Friend!Thank u soo much this made me feel soooo muche better!
Bre
This was a great poem. My boyfriend of 3 months just broke up with me because of another girl. I just laugh to all of my friends and say its no big deal. when all i wanna do is die. Thank you, this helped.
cris
i thought that this was a really good poem!
seren
what an amazing poem, it expressed exactly what i was feeling about a past boyfriend i just cant seem to get over.
Adrienne
Erin, I thought your poem was awesome. I have been through the EXACT thing! I am 16, and when I found out that the "love of my life" was talking to another girl. I spent a whole MONTH telling myself and others that it wasn't a big deal, and I really didn't care. Keep writing girl!
Jen
it made my heart stop because im goin through the same thing, except i could never put it in to words, thanks
Heather
This is a great idea for a poem! Sometimes we try to find things in a relationship (or potential relationship) that aren't there in order to justify not letting go, and your way of saying it was quite eloquent. Good job.
Steph
This was an excellent poem young jedi! I could totally relate! oh my gosh! could i ever! If only i had found the poem about 2 weeks ago when I was feeling it the most! but I'm better now! and I hope you are to! Good job!
Krystal
I have been the same way. I thought that I loved this boy but, I didn't it was really all lust.
kacie
this poem touched me , and it was greatly written
Drie
I loved the poem, I know exactly what your saying, NICE JOB!
Karyn
that is exactly what me and my ex boyfriend are like. we fought lots, more than any other couple we knew. we were both unhappy, we just didn't really know it. it was only lust, and it ended like that.
Natalie
It really has a meaning & I'm sure we've all felt it once.
Wendy
I really liked your poem. It really got to me even though I had to read it twice to make sure I interpreted it right. Keep writing, you are a very good poet.
Kristina
Hey this poem is tight! It took me a minute but when i got it was awesome. I really can relate!
Tara
This is a great poem. Its how i feel for my ex i try to tell myself everyday the same this you say in this poem.
Aly
I really like your poem, and I could relate completely. I liked the ending line the most.
ASHLEY
I really enjoyed your poem and in a way I can relate back to a time that I tried to do something similar. Thanks.
joe
It took me a second to get what it was you were saying, but when I did, I was quite impressed with the last couple lines
kate
i just want to say, that if erin wrote this poem from personal experience,i feel so sorry for her because i feel or am feeling the same.and i know how much it hurts to be decieved.good luck erin, you are a bueatiful poet
Erin
That was really good. Plus you have a good name too!

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