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About the Poem

This poem was retrieved by a friend and he recommended that I distribute it to the rest of the world, even though it that not my bag. It is about my deep heartfelt love for someone untouchable to myself and the struggle of which I felt.

A Few Visitor Comments

Kristen
Wow!. MY names kristen too. god i would have sworn it was about me. i dated a todd once. im in my freshman yr too. wow. awesome awesome great poem! Kristen.
Jennifer
this is a very good poem. and it was really touching.
amanda
oh my god i wish i was kristen to have someone love as much as you love her i would forever be in your arms if i was kristen good luck
anna
What an awesome poem! That really got to me as Ive been in that feeling of inner turmoil over someone myself. I hope that you are feeling better and realise that you deserve the best!

There are More comments below the poem ...

Dearest Kristen

I can't take it any more.
Your driving me insane.
I think of you ever morning when I awaken
and it doesn't stop there.
No, the spell you have cast on me
makes me think of you every hour
and ever minute of every day.
I think of you before I sleep
and even then I am not safe.
you sneak into my dreams. And you haunt me there.

Your hair is like rays of golden sunlight
spilling down your back.
Your eyes so blue they are like pools
of the clearest and purest waters
piercing through me into my soul
and reading my innermost thoughts.
Your smile is like a thousand spring mornings
when the sun first comes up over the horizon
and blesses the land with its light;
you warm me like the sun
when your smile falls upon my face.
I would just like to hold you in my arms
for hours
and let you envelop me in your warmth.
When I first noticed your beauty
I was so taken aback I had to sit down
and ever since that time
you have haunted my thoughts
with your beautiful smile
and the sound of your voice.
Every time I see you in the hall
it is more of an effort
to keep my breathing regular
and keep from weeping
from your sheer beauty
and thanking the lord
for ever letting me meet you.
Every little thing you do
is an amazement to me
and I just want to sit
and watch you for hours.
And yet since I had someone ask
what you thought of me
my life has been going down hill.
"I just like him as a friend"
is what you said
and with those words
you drove a sword into my heart
and left it there.
Now every time I see you,
you seem to avoid me
and avoid my advances
and even talking to me
and every time you
do that you just twist the sword
in my heart deeper.
It hasn't been the same between us since.
Despite the amount I care for you,
you care every bit less
and that hurts so much sometimes
I can't even eat or sleep
for the pain and longing in my heart.
For instance
when we were at dinner with friends Saturday, when I went to greet you,
you hardly cared enough to say hello
and all I could see was you laughing
and shoving the sword ever deeper.
From then on during the party
you avoided talking to me
and shoved it forever deeper.
Do you know how much that hurts me inside?
Well the only 'good' thing
it did
was give me the most aggression
I have ever had on the basketball court,
and for the first time
in ten years of playing basketball
in a league - I fouled out.
I was so mad at everything.
That night at the dinner table
all I did was just slump
and stare at my food getting cold
as you have made my heart.
I did not eat anything,
for the pain deep within my stomach
and in my heart.
When my friends came over later
and tried to cheer me up
because I was so down
it didn't work
because all I could think about was you
and the pain.

How can someone care for you so much
and you just cause pain
such sharp biting pain
in my heart.
What happened to us
were you just toying with me?
trying to make me think I had a chance
and then just watch me wither and die
over you?
Well I'm not going to let you
do that to me anymore
if that's the way you're going to be
then I will give up all hope.
and move on with my life
because no one thinks you are worth it
and I'm starting to agree with them
because you were ruining my life.

But
no
more will I endure this pain.
I can't.
It's making everyone upset
and worried for me.
Yes, the people that really care
about me, you won't take them away from me
because I'm being so damn depressed.
I'm writing this
just to tell you how I feel
and say this is your last chance
because as much as I care for you
and about you,
you will not ruin my life any more.
I will treat you like a queen,
and will expect only that you love me
in return.
I almost already love you
but not any more
I did and I can again.
Last chance, my dear.
I just think I can't go on like this.

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© 1999 Todd R Fussell Please respect the rights of the author and Passions in Poetry. If you would like to use this poem on your own web page, please contact the Author. Thank you.

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More Visitor Comments (from the Voting form)

sage
Its unbleiveable how much you can like or love a person and they just turn you away and murder your deepest feelings its just cruelity. Sorry ya had to go through it but good way of explaining it.
kindalin
omg im about to cry!i feel abit like that atm to. we have alot in common. i play basketball,and for the first time a little whileago i got fauled off!and i hate getting sad over some boy,but i dont think im reeady to give up yet. that has been one of the best poems i have ever read!xxx
sam
your poem was great. i never knew guys had that much of feelings. i went through the same thing even though i am a girl and talking about some guy and it was probley a little different, but hey o well still good.
Claire
wow . thats all i can say. im speechless.
jady
oHhH MYyY GoD! baby that was the most indeepth, touching thing i think i have ever read. Baby she must be blind, you sound so sweet n caring.
Kristen
Wow, you really scared me there for a moment. My name is Kristen, I do have blonde hair, and in my freshman year of high school, I broke up with my childhood sweetheart. His name is extremely similar to yours, Todd, only a few letters are different. You made me cry as I thought of how behaved at this time. To tell you the truth, I could've sworn this was my ex until you started talking about basketball, which he doesn't play. You've opened my eyes to his feelings. I hope you and your Kristen work out.
Stephanie
I just love this poem. Right now i feel like crying cuz its soo sad. A girl u like A LOT doesn't like u the same. I soft of feel ur pain, i still like my ex-boyfriend a lot even tho we went out for like 3 weeks but he was like i dunno how to explain it he treat me soooo WONDERFUL. He doesn't know i still like him but i HOPE he still likes me and i hope he regets breaking up with me but yeah ANYWHO i love ur poem if u write anymore please send them to me. love, a BIG fan
brittney
it's great i feel pulled to it some how i don't know! i really hope this isn't a true poem b*c even though i don't know you judging by this poem you deserve better. i know a girl kristen and she is just like this if this poem is based on your true life experience i'm truly sorry, and you do deserve better!
Julia
OMG this poem makes me weep its so good! Reminds me of a guy i once wanted who still holds a piece of my heart with him. I LOVE IT! Keep writing.
Danielle
I really enjoyed this poem alot I know the feeling of being regeted and still having to see the person walk down the halls. Its does really hurt. And to have someone play with your heart it really does just make you want to scream. The only thing I could do was to pray for all the pain to go away. Thanks for posting this poem it really was an amazing piece of work I enjoyed every word.
Kayla
This is a very good poem. I feel the same way. I treated this guy just like a king, and in 2 weeks he dumped me for another girl. After all I did for him! Im so sad. I hope you keep writing, cause your d*** good!
dana
i thought this story was so sweet! i started crying! some poeple are like that and it is sad!
Nathalie
this is such a beautiful poem ! it really touches me ! it touches my heart, my feelings. the comparisons are awesome and i think that you are really gifted ! keep on writing poems !
Ally
Wow great poem it really helped see the view of someone else there is this guy who loves me and he sounds just like you thanx for sharing your poem it helped me see even more what my friend is feeling
Adam
I Love This Poem, It is so heartwarming, but then it becomes so vigourating, it makes me think of a girl i wanted to date named Cristen, same name just spelled different, what a coincidence huh? well nice poem.
Megan
Wow! That poem really hit me. I can almost feel the pain that he was feeling just by the way he was describing it. Wow!
Greg
I love this poem because i can relate to what the author is saying
Brian
All I can say is 'thank you'. when i was reading this, i swore it was written for me. it's comforting to know that i'm not the only one who feels this way. i know what you've gone through.
rose
wow, i just found out that a frien of mine likes me, and i've pretty much been treating him the same way, but ur poem has made everything different! thanx 4 letting me understand.
Johny
hey Todd that was a great poem and i can realy relate to it. this girl i loved also did the same and loved her for a year and a half before ging up so i give youcredit for putting up with what some girls put us threw. good work and keep it up. you know there should be more guy writers like you.
Red
I really enjoyed the poem even though it was pertty long. It was great keep up the good work.
Leo
This poem is awesome. I feel the pain my girlfriend broke up with me she is the love of my life but i will not give up. The funny thin is her name was Kristen.
Cody
Hey, that poem was like a copy of my life right now. there is this girl named "Crystal" and it seems like she wants to be around me and other times she despises me and it is real hard to tell them how you feel. I wish i could say i feel the same but no matter how much you write you can't fully explain it, but i believe i do feel the same way about this girl as you did yours. I think love can be the most lethal or non-lethal thing in the world. Well im prolly wasting your time and space, well ill cya around and keep writing, until then good luck. CIAO
Tosha
where do I begin?? This such a awesome poem and its hard to believe that someone like you(no, i don't know you) could be hurt so badly by the one you almost loved. Having to go through that most of been awfull--I'm so sorry!
shane
very good!
Johnny
This poem was the best. i hear what you when trow. cause thats what i am going trow i am going to send it to my ex..
Lukasz
You touched my heart. This poem is great. I feel exactly the same like you.I'm in love with a great girl and i care of her and i do all i can to be with her, but she still treats me like a friend- only a friend. Thank you for this poem and wish you luck.
Arin
Todd, I am very sorry for what this girl did to you, and I just wanted to let you know that it is a lovely poem and that you keep it up. And thank you for letting us read it.
Kimber
That was a beautiful poem...but i just have one thing to say, don't take this so bad it happens to everyone! You can lead a heart to love but you can't make it fall! Remember that!
Araseli
Man this wuz an awesome poem! I might not be a poem expert but when a poem makes me cry and touchers my heart then i know its good! I wanna thanx u 4 lettin me see clearly. I am going through the same thing but in my case im "Kristen". My friend told me he had feelings for me and i did exactly what she did. Thanx 4 lettin me see the other side!
Steph
This poem was the sweetest thing. When I got towards the middle I realized that I may have been doing that exact same thing to a guy that liked me, I never meant to hurt him, but couldn't help it. I now regret what I did by ignoring him, this poem opened my eyes. No one could have done it better.
Natalie
That poem was so true! I'm going through it now and I have cried for so long after a guy. We're friends and sometimes he leads me on and ther times he crushes me! I want to move on but i know it's hard! Thanx for the beautiful poem!
Elise
Tou have written the most wonderful poem i've read its unbeleivable the feeling you have for this girl
patty
THIS POEM TOTALLY REMINDS ME OF MY CRUSH NOEL I LOVE HIM AND THINK OF HIM 24/7
fresh
say daw i just wanted to send u props on your poem it is pretty good. im not no poem expert or anything like that but this might help u cope or what not. dont blame shorty for not liking u man. u cant make someone love someone else u just got to get over it. its hard to say and hard to accept but with time comes healing. and in the end u both will be better people for it! peace
claire
ur poem was amazing, it made me cry, this girl must be blind cause i dont know how she doesnt like you, i wish you the best!
mickole
i think this is a really sad poem and i hope it isnt true if it is im very sorry to hear it. it is a very good poem other wise.
Maarten
Hey man, love your poem. You know how to express your feelings. Keep on the good work and good luck with the girls.
Ashley
it was really toching keep up the good work!!!
amanda
WOW! That was an outstanding poem! I've never read anything like that in my life! For the first time, i cried while reading a poem! That was really good work.
Voldemort
great poem...espresses what most people feel...thanx for such a beautyful poem
carnetta
I think are good poem wt. I think you are brave for writting this. Well good luck
Julie
Well out og any poems I have ever read I can honestly say that this one is the one I actually understand and know how the author feels because it also happened to me something like that and well i love your poem!
chasity
I really liked that poem. I can relate to it totally. It was really deep. I liked it a lot.
Kasie
I really like this poem. It shows a lot of feeling about how much he cared for the girl and how she just didn't care. He seems like a sweet guy. I'll go out with him. I loved this poem.
Lizzie
That poem was so great! It took my breath away and left me totaly speech less! This is an amazing poem written by an amazing poet! It gave me a different perspective on peoples thoughts and ideas! I hope that i have some one who feels so strongly about me, like the way you felt about Kristen!
There are 26 Additional Visitor Comments (click to read them)

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