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This is NOT my fault.... I'm really very refined...... yep.. refined...... My neighbor made me do it... She wanted to write it... and my daughter... She wrote "those" verses... and Ron.. He made me post it.... It's not my fault!!.. Not!!... Nope.... Love Poems
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All Poems > Poetry Buffet > Humor and Funny Poems > Ode To Being Blonde Go to next poem

A Man Is A Luxury - Not A Necessity
by Nancy Ness
I do not need
A _ _ _ _ing man
I’ll get one later
If I can.

I do not need
A man at all
I do not need one,
Short or tall.

Not in a house,
Not in a van,
I do not need
A _ _ _ _ing man.

Not on the couch
Not in my bed
I’d rather sleep
Alone instead

I do not need
A _ _ _ _ing man
I tried it once ~
He turned and ran

I do not need
One here or there
I do not need
One anywhere

I do not need
A_ _ _ _ing man
There must be
A better plan

Not one at work
Not one at play
I do not need one
Night or day

I’ve said it once
I’ve said it twice
A world without them
Could be nice

Black men, white men,
Men in blue
I am through with
All of you

Even though they
Make me drool
I’m not a fan of
The dating pool

I would not could not
Be a fool
Even for the
Biggest tool

Now thanks to
My new vibrator
You _ _ _ _ing man
I’ll see you later

I’ll try my hardest
Not to care
Even if he stands
There bare!!

I do not need
A _ _ _ _ing man
That is where my
Plight began

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(c) 1999 Nancy Ness Please respect the rights of the author and Passions in Poetry. If you would like to use this poem on your own web page, please contact the Author. Thank you.
All Poems > Poetry Buffet > Humor and Funny Poems > Ode To Being Blonde Go to next poem
Visitor Comments (from the Voting form)
gesa
I think it is a very cute, but could not think of a proper word to fill in the Blanks.
ADRIANA
I THOUGHT THIS ONE OF THE FUNNIEST POEM I HAVE EVER READ
melissa
This is the best poem I have EVER read in my life.
melissa
a fun poem to read, i totally agree.
Alle
Loved it! This is my a new fav of mine
cris
i luv this poem! it is so true and it put into words how i feel about guys
esther
man its so awesome! hell true dude! ;)i am going to print this poem for all my male friends, let them realise how useless and needless they are. hahaha
sieda
that was good i loved it
Kristy
This poem explains exactly how I feel about the opposite sex. On a scale from 1 to 10, I would give this poem a 12!
Mallory
This poem was very very funny! I would enjoy reading it everyday! GOOD JOB!
Nicole
I loved it. I think every woman has gone through a time in her life when she felt that way, and it was hilarious. Thanks for the laugh.
Charissa
THIS POEM IS THE FUNNIEST ONE. MY FRIEND AND I LOVED IT, WE HAD TO READ IT TO MORE OF OUR FRIENDS. GREAT JOB!
Abhishek
This poem z gr8 . damn funny. yet it means a lot . KEEP IT UP
Cassie
omg! this poem is soooo great! i personaly agree. I don't belive I need a _______ man either!LOL!
Melinda
I could have not said it better!
Gina
loved it!
Wendy
I loved it and so will my two single parent daughters who have had their fare share of men to contend with and both agree they are better off without them . I feel they could have written it themselves.
Lil Ladie
every woman has felt this at least once in tere life!
Lil Ladie
every woman has felt this at least once in tere life!
dycarsha
The poem was very cute. I liked it a lot.
There are 41 Additional Visitor Comments (click to read them)
All Visitor Comments on this poem have been posted by people who wanted to let the author know the poem touched their hearts. If you would like to leave a comment of your own, please click the Vote button in the Response Panel above.

Poems for the People   -  Poems by the People